Lil man had artwork that was selected for the Isle of Wight County Public Schools art show. It started at five on Thursday and we were a little ahead of schedule--since we just so happened to be the same town as my two favorite thrift stores we decided to check one out and then head to the school.
While we were in the thrift store lil man was talking nonstop about anything and everything and he wandered off for a few minutes. He came back and said, "Hey Tommy, they have the move The Mask over there, you know the guy with the green face..." he got distracted by something for a second and found himself back on the subject... "They are on those old kind of movies, you know the ones from back in the olden days when you were younger."
I paused a second and said "First off, they are called VHS tapes and second off, you make it sound like I'm 93 years old." He had a seriously puzzled look on his face when he said but you were around when they came out with those right...it's like when tv was in black and white like in the 17s, 18s, and 19s."
Skrrrrrrt, pump the brakes kid! Tv didn't come around until the 19s not too terribly long ago.... and how old do you think I am? "I dunno, just really old," He told me with the most serious of faces... "How old are you?"
"Dude, I will be 32 at the end of this month. I wasn't born until 1981 so quit making it sound like I'm 93...I'm not that old."
With that I heard a "Hmmmph" we paid for our finds and headed to the art show... I met his art teacher and saw his awesome castle complete with jumping alligators in it's moat... I figured it was going to be a drawing or painting or something---it was wayyyy more awesome than that.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
FINALLY!.
So after all kinds of pain in the ass steps and hurdles I was able to close on the house. My original date of Friday 3.25.2013 dissolved since my loan hadn't been approved yet and then there are steps after that to go through blah blah blah. At 7:30 pm I was notified that the loan was approved, but by that time bankers hours were over so I'd have to wait until Monday or Tuesday to close.
Monday after I got off of work I drove to VA Beach and signed all the paperwork and made it official...Jen and I are now officially homeowners.
So can I just tell you that when I went to Home Depot on Tuesday to buy stuff for work, everything looked different... seriously... I was thinking of all the cool stuff I could do to MY house that I couldn't do before because I was renting...it's amazing and the possibilities are endless... now I just need more money, lol.
Monday after I got off of work I drove to VA Beach and signed all the paperwork and made it official...Jen and I are now officially homeowners.
So can I just tell you that when I went to Home Depot on Tuesday to buy stuff for work, everything looked different... seriously... I was thinking of all the cool stuff I could do to MY house that I couldn't do before because I was renting...it's amazing and the possibilities are endless... now I just need more money, lol.
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Dan Seals - Bop
I remember listening to this song when I was younger--I was super excited to have it come on the radio the other day...hadnt heard it in YEARS!!! I wanna bop with you baby...all night long... I wanna bop the night away...
in laws
It occurred to me last night that Jen and I have well over four years together under our belts...only 3 months of that time officially married... and to this day I don't know what to call her parents. We had this discussion last night after she hung up the phone with her mom. As always Jen relayed the message from her dad saying, "Butch says hi."
Her dad is great, lol...he talks like he's in a cheech and chong movie and has a Fumanchu and is just funny. He mom is the more reserved one of the two, highly opinionated, and knows what she wants and isn't afraid to express what she thinks.
I think part of the struggle I've had over the years in figuring out what to call them has to do where their age differences compared to my parents. My mom will be 53 this summer and my dad will be 59. Jen's mom will be 70 this May and her dad is a few years younger than her.
So, I guess it's always been kind of a "respect your elders" kind of thing... Calling them Mr. and Mrs. last name just seemed way too uptight and not personal... I mean I've been sleeping with there daughter for YEARS people...lol...
While I've talked to Gloria on the phone a few times, I'm not a phone person so I don't make it a habit to find myself on the phone with anyone, much less my mother in law--nothing personal, I just hate talking on the phone, I don't even like talking to Jen on the phone, lol. Anyway, I've always managed to not call her dad by anything--I think i've always segwayed my conversation off of what Jen's Mom had said about him, so I could just follow up with a "he."
Well yesterday, I decided that I needed to find out from Jen what the hell to call her parents...I've gone long enough with this weighing on my mind. She called them and laughed as she told them about my dilemma. her dad very quickly in the background said to just call him dad, but then seemed immediately bothered by the fact he didn't know what I'd been calling him up to this point, lol. Jen's mom said I could call her mom as well but I don't know it just doesnt seem as natural calling them mom and dad... I'll get there though.
Jen has been calling my parents mom and dad since the early stages of our relationship... historically my parents have always been easily labeled mom and dad by neighborhood kids, friends of us kids, and whomever we were dating at the time... so it was no biggie.
I've only brought one girl home who referred to my mom as "mom" and mom quickly informed me that she didn't appreciate it and that she didn't know what I was smoking hanging out with that chick anyway... could have been that she was only like 9 or 10 years younger than my mom and immature as fuck...but who knows, that's all behind us now, ha.
You see, my family is the laid back laugh about everything and joke on one another kind of family... Nothing is off limits... whether its my dad asking me "which tommy" he's talking to (he still jokes that I have multiple personalities--which I dont, he hasn't caught on to the whole bipoloar thing yet, lol) They all tell Mexican jokes in front of Jen because she's hispanic (though albino in comparison to what your first mental image of hispanic is, lol)... everything is a topic, we put the fun in dysfunctional.
Jen's family is more reserved and I recall the first time I was going to Colorado to meet them, Jen had me paranoid as hell. She said that I couldn't cus and that anything I would normally say to my parents was off limits with hers. (side note, I drop the f bomb ALL the time... it's my favorite word--my mom and my moms mom both say fuck all the time now because of it's stress relieving abilities, lol) I even have "fuckity fuck fuck" tattooed on my ass--though in a cursive script font to keep it classy, lol...
Moving on...
Perhaps its the huge paranoia she inspired with all the "prep" involved to meet her parents and family. I will for the record add that for the entire week we were in CO, I did not cus at all. I nearly died. Not even kidding.
Jen was baking cookies, chocolate chip to be exact and her mom wanted her to make some with just walnuts... her mom looked at me and said don't you just love walnuts? and not even thinking I responded, "Nuts aren't very conducive to my lifestyle" Jen nearly passed out, her mom paused for a moment before changing the subject with a hint of a giggle... I almost lost it, thats just a normal comment from me, but wasn't supposed to be normal I was there, lol.
They've kind of caught on that I am who I am and that Jen loves me and I'm not going anywhere so they are more supportive than I had originally imagined.
Moral of the story, I must practice referring to my inlaws as mom and dad... they are cool with it so I guess I need to be too.
Her dad is great, lol...he talks like he's in a cheech and chong movie and has a Fumanchu and is just funny. He mom is the more reserved one of the two, highly opinionated, and knows what she wants and isn't afraid to express what she thinks.
I think part of the struggle I've had over the years in figuring out what to call them has to do where their age differences compared to my parents. My mom will be 53 this summer and my dad will be 59. Jen's mom will be 70 this May and her dad is a few years younger than her.
So, I guess it's always been kind of a "respect your elders" kind of thing... Calling them Mr. and Mrs. last name just seemed way too uptight and not personal... I mean I've been sleeping with there daughter for YEARS people...lol...
While I've talked to Gloria on the phone a few times, I'm not a phone person so I don't make it a habit to find myself on the phone with anyone, much less my mother in law--nothing personal, I just hate talking on the phone, I don't even like talking to Jen on the phone, lol. Anyway, I've always managed to not call her dad by anything--I think i've always segwayed my conversation off of what Jen's Mom had said about him, so I could just follow up with a "he."
Well yesterday, I decided that I needed to find out from Jen what the hell to call her parents...I've gone long enough with this weighing on my mind. She called them and laughed as she told them about my dilemma. her dad very quickly in the background said to just call him dad, but then seemed immediately bothered by the fact he didn't know what I'd been calling him up to this point, lol. Jen's mom said I could call her mom as well but I don't know it just doesnt seem as natural calling them mom and dad... I'll get there though.
Jen has been calling my parents mom and dad since the early stages of our relationship... historically my parents have always been easily labeled mom and dad by neighborhood kids, friends of us kids, and whomever we were dating at the time... so it was no biggie.
I've only brought one girl home who referred to my mom as "mom" and mom quickly informed me that she didn't appreciate it and that she didn't know what I was smoking hanging out with that chick anyway... could have been that she was only like 9 or 10 years younger than my mom and immature as fuck...but who knows, that's all behind us now, ha.
You see, my family is the laid back laugh about everything and joke on one another kind of family... Nothing is off limits... whether its my dad asking me "which tommy" he's talking to (he still jokes that I have multiple personalities--which I dont, he hasn't caught on to the whole bipoloar thing yet, lol) They all tell Mexican jokes in front of Jen because she's hispanic (though albino in comparison to what your first mental image of hispanic is, lol)... everything is a topic, we put the fun in dysfunctional.
Jen's family is more reserved and I recall the first time I was going to Colorado to meet them, Jen had me paranoid as hell. She said that I couldn't cus and that anything I would normally say to my parents was off limits with hers. (side note, I drop the f bomb ALL the time... it's my favorite word--my mom and my moms mom both say fuck all the time now because of it's stress relieving abilities, lol) I even have "fuckity fuck fuck" tattooed on my ass--though in a cursive script font to keep it classy, lol...
Moving on...
Perhaps its the huge paranoia she inspired with all the "prep" involved to meet her parents and family. I will for the record add that for the entire week we were in CO, I did not cus at all. I nearly died. Not even kidding.
Jen was baking cookies, chocolate chip to be exact and her mom wanted her to make some with just walnuts... her mom looked at me and said don't you just love walnuts? and not even thinking I responded, "Nuts aren't very conducive to my lifestyle" Jen nearly passed out, her mom paused for a moment before changing the subject with a hint of a giggle... I almost lost it, thats just a normal comment from me, but wasn't supposed to be normal I was there, lol.
They've kind of caught on that I am who I am and that Jen loves me and I'm not going anywhere so they are more supportive than I had originally imagined.
Moral of the story, I must practice referring to my inlaws as mom and dad... they are cool with it so I guess I need to be too.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Can this just be over with already?
Let me just say that this house buying thing is not nearly what I thought it would be. Our close date is March 22nd--coming up VERY fast... and there is all kinds of crap to do. I had to provide a bazillion documents, 3 years worth of taxes and W2s, bank statements, paystubs...other usual stuff, but because the loan is a VHDA I had to take a first time homebuyers course online and pass the test to get a certificate to be submitted to the folks at closing....
I've endured the ratification process, the home inspection, the back and forth on what to fix and not to fix, the termite inspection, etc... I have been lucky in the sense that the people I'm buying the house from are ready to move into their new house so they want this one gone...they've agreed to all I've asked for which is awesome and they seem like nice people anyway...
The real pain in my ass though has come in two forms. One, I can't move money around in my bank accounts like I usually do because I have to account for all of my income... because Jen's name isn't on my account it's now temporarily a problem if I deposit money into my account from her to help with bills... I can't shift things from savings... so basically it's just my paycheck and then my now limited spending. I had to have Jen make my student loan payment because I can't shift money and now because I don't have her "help" in my account I don't want to be bouncing stuff... my check alone can't pay for everything... So I'm glad that she offered to do it and I appreciate it a great deal--I sure would hate to be told at close that it wasn't going to happen because I defaulted on my Student loan...
Two, homeowners insurance. For some reason I just assumed that this would be an easy process--something like car insurance where you go online, get a quote, and buy a policy...
Not so much.
I was referred by Santa (the real bearded santa in my life who allows me to keep his hair and beard snow white instead of dark brown like it naturally is...) to a guy that he uses and is friends with. That guy is nice to talk to and great to work with, his policy is on the higher side of things which means my mortgage payment will increase as well...
I got a super low quote and attached to it a denial letter--really, why bother sending me a fabulous quote if I'm being denied coverage.
I have one quote that isn't bad and running out of time rapidly. The concern is that it's the original roof on the house so it's 20 years old and that makes most insurance companies pump their brakes a bit. It's kind of a crap shoot as to whether or not the insurance inspector will go for it or not... and let me have coverage or deny me...
I contacted a guy my realtor/aunt suggested and he won't have quotes for me until Monday...he's pulling information for a side by side comparison of the "bigger" companies...
TO BE CONTINUED:
I started this blog last week and never finished it... long story short--it took me a week to decide on a quote that was good. I was referred to this lady by the lady who's handing my closing... shes super nice and helpful so I went ahead and agreed--still running the risk of failing a roof inspection, but I can't lose sleep over it at this point... I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
For now, closing is at the end of this week and I'm super excited and ancy and have no idea when or how I'm going to move all of my crap.
I'm super stoked to soon be a homeowner, but OMG can we just get to that point already. I'd like to skip all the "official" shit and go straight to playing house, you know...
I've endured the ratification process, the home inspection, the back and forth on what to fix and not to fix, the termite inspection, etc... I have been lucky in the sense that the people I'm buying the house from are ready to move into their new house so they want this one gone...they've agreed to all I've asked for which is awesome and they seem like nice people anyway...
The real pain in my ass though has come in two forms. One, I can't move money around in my bank accounts like I usually do because I have to account for all of my income... because Jen's name isn't on my account it's now temporarily a problem if I deposit money into my account from her to help with bills... I can't shift things from savings... so basically it's just my paycheck and then my now limited spending. I had to have Jen make my student loan payment because I can't shift money and now because I don't have her "help" in my account I don't want to be bouncing stuff... my check alone can't pay for everything... So I'm glad that she offered to do it and I appreciate it a great deal--I sure would hate to be told at close that it wasn't going to happen because I defaulted on my Student loan...
Two, homeowners insurance. For some reason I just assumed that this would be an easy process--something like car insurance where you go online, get a quote, and buy a policy...
Not so much.
I was referred by Santa (the real bearded santa in my life who allows me to keep his hair and beard snow white instead of dark brown like it naturally is...) to a guy that he uses and is friends with. That guy is nice to talk to and great to work with, his policy is on the higher side of things which means my mortgage payment will increase as well...
I got a super low quote and attached to it a denial letter--really, why bother sending me a fabulous quote if I'm being denied coverage.
I have one quote that isn't bad and running out of time rapidly. The concern is that it's the original roof on the house so it's 20 years old and that makes most insurance companies pump their brakes a bit. It's kind of a crap shoot as to whether or not the insurance inspector will go for it or not... and let me have coverage or deny me...
I contacted a guy my realtor/aunt suggested and he won't have quotes for me until Monday...he's pulling information for a side by side comparison of the "bigger" companies...
TO BE CONTINUED:
I started this blog last week and never finished it... long story short--it took me a week to decide on a quote that was good. I was referred to this lady by the lady who's handing my closing... shes super nice and helpful so I went ahead and agreed--still running the risk of failing a roof inspection, but I can't lose sleep over it at this point... I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
For now, closing is at the end of this week and I'm super excited and ancy and have no idea when or how I'm going to move all of my crap.
I'm super stoked to soon be a homeowner, but OMG can we just get to that point already. I'd like to skip all the "official" shit and go straight to playing house, you know...
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Over 400 blogs... a journey back to the beginning
I started to look back into my blog history now that I've written over 400 blogs... the second blog entry I found was a poem I had written for Jen... It's crazy how in the day to day I forget to remind her of how special she is too me...
I wonder if she remembers this poem or not?
I Wanted, a poem I wrote 2-19-2009
I wonder if she remembers this poem or not?
I Wanted, a poem I wrote 2-19-2009
More book talk and my peculiar author crush, lol
So I forgot to mention that I read another one of R.E. Bradshaw's books. This time it was Rainey Days and in short, I like it. Nothing has come close to Waking up Gray yet though... I haven't given up (It could be that I have enjoyed that book so much more just because of my relationship with the Outer Banks, Hatteras, and Ocracoke, NC...)
It's pretty amazing to me how easy of a read her books are... I get started and don't want to put them down--I've guessed a couple of twists along the way before reading them but not because they were see through, more because I have warped mind and well that's just where my imagination took me... lol.
I like the way this Bradshaw lady thinks and I like her writing style. I would even venture to say that I have an author crush for her, haha... I'm not sure what that means... I'm not trying to be her stalker by any means, nor do I know everything there is to know about her, but as far as authors I keep going back to--she's been the flavor for the past several months.
The only negative thing I have to say right now (which doesn't reflect on her, so much as it does Amazon) is that I have yet to find the second book to the Rainy Bell Mystery collection in ebook form for kindle.
Sure, I could buy it in paperback, but then I'd just have another book laying around after I read it it and would just take up space... at least with the Kindle app on my IPAD everything is stored in there nice and neat should I ever go back and decide to read some more...
Anyway, if you are reading this and have the time, check out R.E. Bradshaw's Blog. I enjoy her blog sometimes more than I do her books... Waking Up Gray by R.E. Bradshaw, still my fave
OH MY GOD!!! So when I went to amazon to find the link for Waking up Gray, there in the bottom in the "you may also like" section was Rainey Nights, book two of the Rainey Bell Mysteries.... HOW DID I MISS THIS BEFORE!!! THIS IS A GREAT WAY TO START A WEDNESDAY.
It's pretty amazing to me how easy of a read her books are... I get started and don't want to put them down--I've guessed a couple of twists along the way before reading them but not because they were see through, more because I have warped mind and well that's just where my imagination took me... lol.
I like the way this Bradshaw lady thinks and I like her writing style. I would even venture to say that I have an author crush for her, haha... I'm not sure what that means... I'm not trying to be her stalker by any means, nor do I know everything there is to know about her, but as far as authors I keep going back to--she's been the flavor for the past several months.
The only negative thing I have to say right now (which doesn't reflect on her, so much as it does Amazon) is that I have yet to find the second book to the Rainy Bell Mystery collection in ebook form for kindle.
Sure, I could buy it in paperback, but then I'd just have another book laying around after I read it it and would just take up space... at least with the Kindle app on my IPAD everything is stored in there nice and neat should I ever go back and decide to read some more...
Anyway, if you are reading this and have the time, check out R.E. Bradshaw's Blog. I enjoy her blog sometimes more than I do her books... Waking Up Gray by R.E. Bradshaw, still my fave
OH MY GOD!!! So when I went to amazon to find the link for Waking up Gray, there in the bottom in the "you may also like" section was Rainey Nights, book two of the Rainey Bell Mysteries.... HOW DID I MISS THIS BEFORE!!! THIS IS A GREAT WAY TO START A WEDNESDAY.
Silver Linings Playbook
WHAT A GREAT MOVIE!!! I didn't realize until I read I'm not Crazy, just Bipolar's blog that the director took on the project because his son is bipolar....
Well I can tell you I LOVE LOVE LOVED this movie. Jen unfortunately didn't watch it with me... she caught a bit here and there and was like, whoa were you ever like that to which I left and said worse... the good thing is that I can laugh about that stuff these days...
But back to the important things---this movie... if you haven't seen it yet YOU NEED TO! It was a great story and a movie where I even loved the ending (normally movies are good and then piss me off at the end, not this one) Bradley Cooper and Hunger Games Chick, Jennifer Lawrence are great together!!!
Watch it.
Well I can tell you I LOVE LOVE LOVED this movie. Jen unfortunately didn't watch it with me... she caught a bit here and there and was like, whoa were you ever like that to which I left and said worse... the good thing is that I can laugh about that stuff these days...
But back to the important things---this movie... if you haven't seen it yet YOU NEED TO! It was a great story and a movie where I even loved the ending (normally movies are good and then piss me off at the end, not this one) Bradley Cooper and Hunger Games Chick, Jennifer Lawrence are great together!!!
Watch it.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Accepted
The offer I made on my first choice house was accepted within 24 hours of the offer being made...AWESOME... they accepted less than the asking price and are helping me with my closing cost which is a condition to the type of loan I have...
This is exciting. My home inspection is scheduled for tomorrow and if all goes well with it then closing will be set for March 22nd and then Jen and i will be homeowners.
On top of that, Jen starts her new job on Wednesday and I feel like its going to be a much needed change for her... better hours, better environment, just better....
Now if I can just get my mind right...everything will be all good. Especially since we have received a few wedding presents now... (though as I mentioned before it would make me happy if I at least got acknowledgment of the whole event... and well that seems to be finally happening little by little..
I did get one card that had an emphasis on how god loves me and what I'm doing is wrong, but we won't count that one, lol.
This is exciting. My home inspection is scheduled for tomorrow and if all goes well with it then closing will be set for March 22nd and then Jen and i will be homeowners.
On top of that, Jen starts her new job on Wednesday and I feel like its going to be a much needed change for her... better hours, better environment, just better....
Now if I can just get my mind right...everything will be all good. Especially since we have received a few wedding presents now... (though as I mentioned before it would make me happy if I at least got acknowledgment of the whole event... and well that seems to be finally happening little by little..
I did get one card that had an emphasis on how god loves me and what I'm doing is wrong, but we won't count that one, lol.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
house
I made an offer on a house yesterday that will be submitted this morning. I'm not all that positive that it will go through... I mean at the end of the day it will end up being 15000 less than what they are asking for. I like the house and can see myself living there, but Jen loves it more. Considering that I hadn't got much of a reaction out of her over the last several months we've spent looking at houses... I figured it was a sign.
I actually think I'd prefer our plan B house which is on the same street. It's a foreclosure so I could probably get a good deal on it... the only draw back to that one is that the fence in the back yard is only partially complete where the other is finished. So sure a little bit extra work before we could get into it... but still awesome. The cabinets are cool and it has a corner sink which is one of those weird things that I just really dig. It has a detached two car garage with a workshop that I could just see myself disappearing to and doing random projects like building those adirondack chairs I've always wanted to make...
But i would be content with either one should the stars be in my favor... It's exciting and scary all at the same time... I'm crossing my fingers and hoping for the best... should things work out, we'd be moved into our new place by the beginning of April at the latest...
At this point, time will tell.
I actually think I'd prefer our plan B house which is on the same street. It's a foreclosure so I could probably get a good deal on it... the only draw back to that one is that the fence in the back yard is only partially complete where the other is finished. So sure a little bit extra work before we could get into it... but still awesome. The cabinets are cool and it has a corner sink which is one of those weird things that I just really dig. It has a detached two car garage with a workshop that I could just see myself disappearing to and doing random projects like building those adirondack chairs I've always wanted to make...
But i would be content with either one should the stars be in my favor... It's exciting and scary all at the same time... I'm crossing my fingers and hoping for the best... should things work out, we'd be moved into our new place by the beginning of April at the latest...
At this point, time will tell.
Monday, January 28, 2013
Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Before Christmas I went from a naturaly light brown/dark blonde to black. I felt like it "matched my soul" lol... a few weeks ago, I bleached out the black and went "Hot Tamale" which was a reddish orange color... I wasn't feeling that so last week I went burgandy....I'm not really feeling that right now either so I think Im going to bleach it again and go blonder... The problem is that my hair is the longest it's been in a long time and my meds are making my hair not as "tough" as it used to be... so my hair is already breaking so I'm tempting fate by bleaching it again, but I'm an idiot and never learn... so I've got hair today, but doesn't mean I'll have it tomorrow... luckily I have a nice hat collection :) Crossing my fingers.
lesbian fiction via R.E. Bradshaw
Okay I've recently started what I believe is my fourth book written by R.E. Bradshaw. So far none have come close to comparing with Waking Up Gray, but were enjoyable.
I get irritated sometimes because it seems to be a common thing in her books where the main character is beautiful, comes from money or inherited a crap ton of money... and sometimes I sit and wonder where are the chunky/fat girls that are broke.. don't they deserve love too, lol.
I guess I'll have to write that book... and who knows, maybe one day. For now I'll stick to blogging my random "empty" thoughts and working on my novel (if you would call it that...I'm not sure) I havent worked on it in months and know that once I start again words will pour out of me, but for now I'm just not motivated in that direction. I think it's because it has to do with my life and I'm at a point in my life where I just don't want to think about some things--sure they made me who i am today, but doesn't mean I want to rehash this stuff daily...
But I digress... R.E. Bradshaw is a great author and I do like her work don't get me wrong, I just needed something that was "different." I am not reading Rainey Days (a mystery)... so far I like it.
Previously I read, Waking up Gray (which was beyond phenomenal in my opinion)... Sweet Carolina Girls which wasn't bad and The Girl Back Home which again wasn't bad but just wasn't what I was in the mood for I suppose.
I've got several different books on my Kindle App that I want to read but just can't get into at the moment.. so if nothing else, one positive note about RE Bradswhaw's books is that she keeps my attention... that is not an easy thing to do.
I get irritated sometimes because it seems to be a common thing in her books where the main character is beautiful, comes from money or inherited a crap ton of money... and sometimes I sit and wonder where are the chunky/fat girls that are broke.. don't they deserve love too, lol.
I guess I'll have to write that book... and who knows, maybe one day. For now I'll stick to blogging my random "empty" thoughts and working on my novel (if you would call it that...I'm not sure) I havent worked on it in months and know that once I start again words will pour out of me, but for now I'm just not motivated in that direction. I think it's because it has to do with my life and I'm at a point in my life where I just don't want to think about some things--sure they made me who i am today, but doesn't mean I want to rehash this stuff daily...
But I digress... R.E. Bradshaw is a great author and I do like her work don't get me wrong, I just needed something that was "different." I am not reading Rainey Days (a mystery)... so far I like it.
Previously I read, Waking up Gray (which was beyond phenomenal in my opinion)... Sweet Carolina Girls which wasn't bad and The Girl Back Home which again wasn't bad but just wasn't what I was in the mood for I suppose.
I've got several different books on my Kindle App that I want to read but just can't get into at the moment.. so if nothing else, one positive note about RE Bradswhaw's books is that she keeps my attention... that is not an easy thing to do.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Being married has me bummed
I should have known better than to have an idea of how things would be in my head prior to it happening... I figured a same sex marriage would be the same as a hetero one in the sense of ceremony, announcements, gifts, etc....
I'm finding however that this is not the case. I'm bummed because I've only had about 3 people congratulate me. Of those 2 were family (my mom and grandmas) okay so make that 4 total... But no one made a big deal of it or even really acknowledges it and that bothers the pure piss out of me.
This is my first and hopefully last marriage and Jen's second. Jen had the stereotypical wedding last time so for her, it was no big deal to just elope. For me... I have gone from not believing in marriage or ever being able to see myself with one person in the long term to well, married and committed.
My dream wedding (like if I had unlimited funds) would have been to rent out a bed and breakfast in Vermont and have mine and Jen's family stay there with us... make a weekend out of it. I'd stand at the alter in a white flowy basic dress next to Jen in something similar (both of us in flip flops)... and our bridesmaids would have a different color dress on and stand next to us going something like red, orange, yellow, green, white, white, blue, indigo, violet and have a rainbow and it would just be fabulous...
Well in real life, it was a trip to DC in a day to get hitched and then back home. Money is tight and stuff went wrong with our license so we had to change dates last minute (and I do mean last minute)... but it worked out... it was practical and a great marriage isn't based off of how spectacular a show you put on for the ceremony... it's just a "hey that would have been cool" kind of notion.
We sent out announcements to family and friends letting them know that we were hitched. We've recieved no congrats cards in the mail, no phone calls wishing us luck, nothing. My grandma is the exception because she was super excited and reminded me that even though she doesn't necessarily agree with it (or it's not for her) she believes that you can't ignore your heart... well she bought Jen and I a crap load of Omaha Steaks as a wedding present.
Even my parents didn't make a big fuss over the whole thing. I want to be selfish right now. I want the spotlight on me and Jen and I want to get wedding presents dammit. What bride doesn't want presents? At this point I'd settle for acknowledgement.
I'm not going to hold my breath... but for now I am bummed. I'll get over it I'm sure...
I'm finding however that this is not the case. I'm bummed because I've only had about 3 people congratulate me. Of those 2 were family (my mom and grandmas) okay so make that 4 total... But no one made a big deal of it or even really acknowledges it and that bothers the pure piss out of me.
This is my first and hopefully last marriage and Jen's second. Jen had the stereotypical wedding last time so for her, it was no big deal to just elope. For me... I have gone from not believing in marriage or ever being able to see myself with one person in the long term to well, married and committed.
My dream wedding (like if I had unlimited funds) would have been to rent out a bed and breakfast in Vermont and have mine and Jen's family stay there with us... make a weekend out of it. I'd stand at the alter in a white flowy basic dress next to Jen in something similar (both of us in flip flops)... and our bridesmaids would have a different color dress on and stand next to us going something like red, orange, yellow, green, white, white, blue, indigo, violet and have a rainbow and it would just be fabulous...
Well in real life, it was a trip to DC in a day to get hitched and then back home. Money is tight and stuff went wrong with our license so we had to change dates last minute (and I do mean last minute)... but it worked out... it was practical and a great marriage isn't based off of how spectacular a show you put on for the ceremony... it's just a "hey that would have been cool" kind of notion.
We sent out announcements to family and friends letting them know that we were hitched. We've recieved no congrats cards in the mail, no phone calls wishing us luck, nothing. My grandma is the exception because she was super excited and reminded me that even though she doesn't necessarily agree with it (or it's not for her) she believes that you can't ignore your heart... well she bought Jen and I a crap load of Omaha Steaks as a wedding present.
Even my parents didn't make a big fuss over the whole thing. I want to be selfish right now. I want the spotlight on me and Jen and I want to get wedding presents dammit. What bride doesn't want presents? At this point I'd settle for acknowledgement.
I'm not going to hold my breath... but for now I am bummed. I'll get over it I'm sure...
I was going to go on a diet, but decided to weight.
It's no secret that I've struggled with my weight since I was in middle school. Each year the scale reads a higher number and my clothes seem to go up in size. I've stayed around the same give or take 10 pounds for the last couple of years (though it doesn't make world of difference in the scheme of things).
The problem I face now is that my work pants, aka company issued uniform pants are too tight. They are Women's Dickies Carpenter jeans and already look ridiculous because they are cut weird and the butt pockets sit on the back of my leg and not my butt...
Well even if I were to just say screw it and go up another size--THEY DON'T EVEN MAKE A BIGGER SIZE!!! My usual size 22 ass is already in a 24 because the way that Dickies are cut... and well anything larger isn't an option with the company that issues us our pants...
I already don't have uniform shirts like everyone else because everyone else is a dude and I'm a chick so the dude style button up shirts don't work for me either...they make me look sloppy because the short sleeves come down as 3/4 length sleeves--anyway it's a hot mess.
So I've decided that now is the time to really make an effort. I can't be miserable in pants that I can't button or worry about blowing the ass out of my pants when I squat down to pick something up... I'm going to go low carb as of tomorrow. (yes it's always tomorrow)...
I've got to do something different and well Atkins style is going to be the quickest way to jump start something...once I get down a few pounds then I'll adapt it and do something a little different.
I'm giving myself a goal as well. With tax time here and potential money coming back, I always like to get a tattoo when I have "extra" money... well I'm not allowing myself to get a tattoo until I'm down 50 pounds. No matter how long that takes or how much extra money I have... no tattoos for me... which means tattoo #21 is on hold for now.
I can do this, i can do this, i can do this...OMG!!! I just need pants that fit--i'm miserable in my body right now and it's affecting all aspects of my life, not just work pants... crossing my fingers and sticking to this dammit.
The problem I face now is that my work pants, aka company issued uniform pants are too tight. They are Women's Dickies Carpenter jeans and already look ridiculous because they are cut weird and the butt pockets sit on the back of my leg and not my butt...
Well even if I were to just say screw it and go up another size--THEY DON'T EVEN MAKE A BIGGER SIZE!!! My usual size 22 ass is already in a 24 because the way that Dickies are cut... and well anything larger isn't an option with the company that issues us our pants...
I already don't have uniform shirts like everyone else because everyone else is a dude and I'm a chick so the dude style button up shirts don't work for me either...they make me look sloppy because the short sleeves come down as 3/4 length sleeves--anyway it's a hot mess.
So I've decided that now is the time to really make an effort. I can't be miserable in pants that I can't button or worry about blowing the ass out of my pants when I squat down to pick something up... I'm going to go low carb as of tomorrow. (yes it's always tomorrow)...
I've got to do something different and well Atkins style is going to be the quickest way to jump start something...once I get down a few pounds then I'll adapt it and do something a little different.
I'm giving myself a goal as well. With tax time here and potential money coming back, I always like to get a tattoo when I have "extra" money... well I'm not allowing myself to get a tattoo until I'm down 50 pounds. No matter how long that takes or how much extra money I have... no tattoos for me... which means tattoo #21 is on hold for now.
I can do this, i can do this, i can do this...OMG!!! I just need pants that fit--i'm miserable in my body right now and it's affecting all aspects of my life, not just work pants... crossing my fingers and sticking to this dammit.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
MACKLEMORE & RYAN LEWIS - SAME LOVE feat. MARY LAMBERT (OFFICIAL VIDEO)
I had heard this song a few times on the reaido and fell in love with it... I watched the video for the first time today and actually got a teary eyed at the end... great song "supports marriage equality"
My new favorite song
Lil man and I love love LOVE THIS SONG. I play the edited version for him of course. Now we have music, movies, legos, and other random things in common... gotta love it.
Yes, yes, I do dammit.
Jen and I made it official in Washington, D.C. on December 31, 2012. Sure, we live in Virginia so our union isn't recognized as a marriage or anything for that matter and well, no we can't claim anything other than Single on our taxes for state or Federal for that matter... and yes it's true--if I were to be put on life support, she couldn't make any decisions for me or speak for me on my behalf.
But despite all of the things that my "same-sex" marriage doesn't allow for, Jen and my relationship and love for each other makes up for anything lacking. Do we want to be equals with the hetero world, absolutely... Do we want to be recognized as a regular married couple, absolutely... Do we want to be treated like we have the plague when we go to school on the same night for school functions to support our 9 year old--um, hell no.
Jen and I are just regular people, in our world anyway. We are a family. The only difference is that where the "norm" (as overrated as it may be) is for there to be a mom, dad, kids, etc...ours has two moms, a son, two dogs, a hermit crab, etc
We ran into a situation a couple months back where lil man had a friend over to spend the night. Usually, this kid is good, plays well with lil man and what not, but this time I overheard them playing and lil man's friend said something was gay. I asked him what he said and he repeated it as if nothing was wrong--but first off kid you are 9 and second of all where do you get off using gay as an adjective--what do you know? He had overheard it in the Tony Hawk cartoon movie I had bought lil man--one that I didn't think I was going to need to prescreen, but turned out otherwise. I had to nip that in the bud right there and explain that there is nothing wrong with being gay and that it shouldn't be used in a negative context. (though I said it more on a 9 year old's level)
Lil man tripped over the dog on the back porch and hollered SON OF A and then screeched to a halt when he saw me standing at the foot of the deck steps. The moral of the story is that I know he's going to pick things up (I say son of a --normally stop before the bitch part comes out but not always) and he sees TV hears things at school etc... What's important to me is that he doesn't get to the point in his life where because of what some kids at school may say about having two mom's he feels like an outcast or like having two moms is wrong.
Lil man's father is morman. So when lil man is visiting his dad he has to spend like all day Sunday in church, he's not allowed caffeine, etc...when he's with his mother and me (which is like 302 days a year) he has the option of going to church and we let him decide what kind he wants to go to--I feel like he should be exposed to as many different things as possible so that he not only grows up a little more well rounded, but so that he can respect the fact that people are different and that's what makes the world great. A lot of times lil man will opt to just stay in pajamas and have "family time" where we all kind of just veg and watch movies, break for alone time, and then go back to family stuff... it works for us...
Does everyone agree with this, no... but do I lose sleep over it, absolutely not. For now lil man loves having two moms. He likes the reaction he gets from kids in his class when he talks about his mom and his mommy, and how it makes him stand out and get attention because so far he's been the only one to have that in his classes thus far (a perk to living in the country I suppose, he gets extra attention and stands out)... there will be a point that some kids parent is going to not let there kid come over and play because of the fact he has two moms and part of me dreads that day.
He loves that he gets so much attention from his moms and that he doesn't have to fight to be in the spotlight. Jen and I got married while he was visiting his dad for Christmas break--we knew that he wanted to be there for it, but we eloped and opted for a simple deal focused more on the making it official part than the ceremony itself... so he was okay with it in the long run, but when he found out--the first thing he asked me was, "Ya'll aren't going to have anymore kids now that you're married are you?" I just smiled and said, "EWWWWWW. I don't even like little kids" to which he laughed, gave me a hug and ran up to his room to play for a bit.
He still hasn't outgrown the stage where when we all go to the store or something he stands in the middle of Jen and I and holds both of our hands... I cherish those little things and it does scare me to think about what will happen in all of our futures if the world doesn't become a little more open minded of a place.
Jen and I are wife and wife now and we are lucky to after over four years together be able to say we have a great family, not only in our home, but extended as well. It took Jen's family a little more to get used to the idea that she was gay and she'll never be quite as open as I am (unless she's hanging out with my family and well then she always surprises me with some of the stuff she says, but she knows it's acceptable because my parents, sister, and brother, etc all say what's on our mind and very seldom do we filter it for anyone...)
I didn't know what married life would feel like but I knew it was going to be great. In truth, it's no different overall--except for the smile that comes across Jen's face when I refer to her with a mocking "wifey" or vice versa.
I'm one of those people that wants everyone to know I'm gay...Jen is more reserved and feels like it's not everyone's business--but more than I want people to know that I'm gay--I want people to know that I'm in love with a wonderful woman and that we have a great family. That at the end of the day is what matters. Not what anyone calls it, not how anyone feels about it, just the fact that my family is great and is just like yours, only maybe a little bit better, lol.
But despite all of the things that my "same-sex" marriage doesn't allow for, Jen and my relationship and love for each other makes up for anything lacking. Do we want to be equals with the hetero world, absolutely... Do we want to be recognized as a regular married couple, absolutely... Do we want to be treated like we have the plague when we go to school on the same night for school functions to support our 9 year old--um, hell no.
Jen and I are just regular people, in our world anyway. We are a family. The only difference is that where the "norm" (as overrated as it may be) is for there to be a mom, dad, kids, etc...ours has two moms, a son, two dogs, a hermit crab, etc
We ran into a situation a couple months back where lil man had a friend over to spend the night. Usually, this kid is good, plays well with lil man and what not, but this time I overheard them playing and lil man's friend said something was gay. I asked him what he said and he repeated it as if nothing was wrong--but first off kid you are 9 and second of all where do you get off using gay as an adjective--what do you know? He had overheard it in the Tony Hawk cartoon movie I had bought lil man--one that I didn't think I was going to need to prescreen, but turned out otherwise. I had to nip that in the bud right there and explain that there is nothing wrong with being gay and that it shouldn't be used in a negative context. (though I said it more on a 9 year old's level)
Lil man tripped over the dog on the back porch and hollered SON OF A and then screeched to a halt when he saw me standing at the foot of the deck steps. The moral of the story is that I know he's going to pick things up (I say son of a --normally stop before the bitch part comes out but not always) and he sees TV hears things at school etc... What's important to me is that he doesn't get to the point in his life where because of what some kids at school may say about having two mom's he feels like an outcast or like having two moms is wrong.
Lil man's father is morman. So when lil man is visiting his dad he has to spend like all day Sunday in church, he's not allowed caffeine, etc...when he's with his mother and me (which is like 302 days a year) he has the option of going to church and we let him decide what kind he wants to go to--I feel like he should be exposed to as many different things as possible so that he not only grows up a little more well rounded, but so that he can respect the fact that people are different and that's what makes the world great. A lot of times lil man will opt to just stay in pajamas and have "family time" where we all kind of just veg and watch movies, break for alone time, and then go back to family stuff... it works for us...
Does everyone agree with this, no... but do I lose sleep over it, absolutely not. For now lil man loves having two moms. He likes the reaction he gets from kids in his class when he talks about his mom and his mommy, and how it makes him stand out and get attention because so far he's been the only one to have that in his classes thus far (a perk to living in the country I suppose, he gets extra attention and stands out)... there will be a point that some kids parent is going to not let there kid come over and play because of the fact he has two moms and part of me dreads that day.
He loves that he gets so much attention from his moms and that he doesn't have to fight to be in the spotlight. Jen and I got married while he was visiting his dad for Christmas break--we knew that he wanted to be there for it, but we eloped and opted for a simple deal focused more on the making it official part than the ceremony itself... so he was okay with it in the long run, but when he found out--the first thing he asked me was, "Ya'll aren't going to have anymore kids now that you're married are you?" I just smiled and said, "EWWWWWW. I don't even like little kids" to which he laughed, gave me a hug and ran up to his room to play for a bit.
He still hasn't outgrown the stage where when we all go to the store or something he stands in the middle of Jen and I and holds both of our hands... I cherish those little things and it does scare me to think about what will happen in all of our futures if the world doesn't become a little more open minded of a place.
Jen and I are wife and wife now and we are lucky to after over four years together be able to say we have a great family, not only in our home, but extended as well. It took Jen's family a little more to get used to the idea that she was gay and she'll never be quite as open as I am (unless she's hanging out with my family and well then she always surprises me with some of the stuff she says, but she knows it's acceptable because my parents, sister, and brother, etc all say what's on our mind and very seldom do we filter it for anyone...)
I didn't know what married life would feel like but I knew it was going to be great. In truth, it's no different overall--except for the smile that comes across Jen's face when I refer to her with a mocking "wifey" or vice versa.
I'm one of those people that wants everyone to know I'm gay...Jen is more reserved and feels like it's not everyone's business--but more than I want people to know that I'm gay--I want people to know that I'm in love with a wonderful woman and that we have a great family. That at the end of the day is what matters. Not what anyone calls it, not how anyone feels about it, just the fact that my family is great and is just like yours, only maybe a little bit better, lol.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
sleeping my way to the top
I work as a plant administrator for a great company. What that means is I'm a plant manager without a background in manufacturing... I am the only woman here. There are other women in this small company (all about 70 or 80 employees total in the US) but I'm the only one here in Virginia.
Yesterday I walked passed a dump truck that was dumping a load into the pit for us. I didn't recognize the driver, but I still smiled and said hello to HER and kept walking so that I could do what I went out to do. I found out this afternoon (the day after seeing the dump truck chick) the conversation that occurred.
Chick driver: Who is that?
employee: She's our boss
Chick driver: Your boss? Is she the owner's wife?
employee: No, why would you ask that
Chick driver: well how did she get to be the boss
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? It is hard enough in this industry to be taken seriously by all the men I'm surrounded by... female management in manufacturing, distribution, etc seems to be far from the "norm." I would expect a dumb ass comment like to come from arrogant ass dude, like one of my employees after pissing him off or something...
But for that dumb shit to come out of a woman's mouth--a woman driving a dump truck no less really pisses me off. No, I didn't blow anybody to get my job. The next time I see her I want to be like "BITCH, YOU DON'T KNOW MY LIFE." lol... but I won't I'll be professional like always and keep it moving--but I'll say really mean shit about her in my head.
Hmmmmmmph, the nerve of some people. That would be like me asking her if she was a lesbian just because she drives a truck, ASSANINE really. hell if I knew getting a job was as easy as putting an ad in the paper offering to trade sex for a job I wouldn't have been unemployed for as long as I was prior to this.
Stupid bitch. She puts the C in cunt (a word that I love, sorry ladies or anyone offended by it) Whatever happened to the fight for equality... apparently she had too many pricks in her face to realize that times have changed and women can do anything they want (well except for marry another woman in most states)... lol for the love of pete... I want to hit someone now... time to just take a breath and move past people's stupidity.
Yesterday I walked passed a dump truck that was dumping a load into the pit for us. I didn't recognize the driver, but I still smiled and said hello to HER and kept walking so that I could do what I went out to do. I found out this afternoon (the day after seeing the dump truck chick) the conversation that occurred.
Chick driver: Who is that?
employee: She's our boss
Chick driver: Your boss? Is she the owner's wife?
employee: No, why would you ask that
Chick driver: well how did she get to be the boss
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? It is hard enough in this industry to be taken seriously by all the men I'm surrounded by... female management in manufacturing, distribution, etc seems to be far from the "norm." I would expect a dumb ass comment like to come from arrogant ass dude, like one of my employees after pissing him off or something...
But for that dumb shit to come out of a woman's mouth--a woman driving a dump truck no less really pisses me off. No, I didn't blow anybody to get my job. The next time I see her I want to be like "BITCH, YOU DON'T KNOW MY LIFE." lol... but I won't I'll be professional like always and keep it moving--but I'll say really mean shit about her in my head.
Hmmmmmmph, the nerve of some people. That would be like me asking her if she was a lesbian just because she drives a truck, ASSANINE really. hell if I knew getting a job was as easy as putting an ad in the paper offering to trade sex for a job I wouldn't have been unemployed for as long as I was prior to this.
Stupid bitch. She puts the C in cunt (a word that I love, sorry ladies or anyone offended by it) Whatever happened to the fight for equality... apparently she had too many pricks in her face to realize that times have changed and women can do anything they want (well except for marry another woman in most states)... lol for the love of pete... I want to hit someone now... time to just take a breath and move past people's stupidity.
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