So Friday proved to be a rough day for me in the sense that I realized that while my job is not phyiscally difficult on most days (unless I hop in a truck and help my contractors unload it--which happens from time to time, but not as much now that the bulk of the freight has been furniture ranging from these awesome beach chairs, well officially Adirondack chairs to 250 pound dining room tables)--damn I ramble, oh well. So the point is that my job is the most emotionally difficult shit I've ever had to do. My original thought last September when I layed off 13 people from my shift, and my boss layed off another 12 from hers was that you have to be heartless to be in management and not have shit like that bother you.
I mean, hey shit happens, I understand that, really I do, however, I never planned on having to fire someone who didnt deserve it or hadnt done something to warrant them being escorted out of the building. Since I started in my position in August as Second Shift On-site Supervisor (or team lead depending on how you want to look at it) I've probably had to fire 150 people on the low side--of those, probably only 30 were for issues such as violating attendence policies, or safety policies (actually one I had to fire because he threatened another contractor with a knife on the recieving dock--that was interesting. I came back to the warehouse from the hospital because I had another contractor hurt themselves to see another contractor sitting outside with one of the Cost Plus supervisors. They had to wait for me to get there because of co-employment laws or some shit (mind you I work for a staffing agency and its out job to provide labor to Cost Plus) moving on... I find out what had happened and he went to go inside to call a ride because I couldnt have him going back into work and we had to stall him until the police got there--I never thought I'd have to say something along the lines of, "Hey dude, can I hold you knife for you when you go back into the building?" He handed it over with no issues, I guess its a good thing to have rapport with your contractors even if alot of them are quite scary lol. The cops came, he was fired, etc etc etc
But anyway--Friday I got a list of more people to end assignments for and I'm sorry but I know its my job but it fucking sucks to be the bad guy when the economy as bad as it is. Granted I'm just the messenger and I don't decide who stays and who goes --but I cant help but think sometimes what I'm going to walk out of the warehouse and find (i.e. my truck keyed with some flattering sign of endearment such as CUNT or someone waiting with a knife or gun, or just fists in general...its scary sometimes) I personally try and get along with everyone, but its not a good thing when people come from the main office and are scared to walk the floor of the warehouse because of how "hood" things looked--okay way to go stereotyper...
People are dumb sometimes. So anyway there is some sketchy shit going on and I'm always the last one to know shit because I'm low man on the totem pole. I can't even explain what is going on right now but I had to knowingly lie to four of my contractors and say there was no work on Monday so that they can be at home and waiting for a phone call to be fired by the big boss because of some fucked up Virginia law related to co-employment or some shit. They won't give me details and the only reason I know that much is from a reliable source at Cost Plus World Market...Yeah I've got some hella rapport with some folks. When my bosses are telling me shit and I'm getting details from folks that I'm not supposed to SOMETHING IS MOTHER FUCKING UP.
Oh did I mention I'm paranoid by nature. So anyway I ended up ending about 20 assignments yesterday at end of shift and just wanted to cry. I like being a supervisor and I love my job for sure (most of the time) but they dynamics of everything are changing and the constant not knowing from one day to the next is killing me. I realize taht the economy blows right now and that really no one has job security, but I would like a little more than I have. For now I'm just going to be thankful to have a job.
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