Wednesday, April 16, 2014

What's the secret?

After a week on Atkins I am down 7.5 lbs.  Super exciting... but I have a predicament.  I did really well that first week (minus a couple of cheats) but this week is way more difficult than last.

Monday began a rather stressful and taxing, mentally draining work week for me.  My boss is taking it out of me from his office in ATL and plans to be up here for the next four to five weeks starting this coming Monday.

For me stress, mental exhaustion lead to eating and craving. Monday evening (keep in mind my 1 week weigh in was just that morning) I said fuck it and had Chick-fila for dinner along with 1/2 of a Sonic Blast.  Well within 15 minutes I was praying to the porcelain gods since my body went into total shock over the amount of sugar I had just ingested.... a couple of hours later I was starving so I had a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios and a peanut butter and Jelly sandwich... yep, got sick again, but this time went to bed.

Yesterday I did good during the day (it's normally always easier when I'm at work...) But then when I got home not so much.  I made made myself a huge salad with chicken I had done with cajun seasonings....I tried a new salad dressing that was AWFUL... I had 2 flavors of it... Honey mustard which tasted like Elmer's glue smells, and Bacon Ranch which tasted like ball sweat and ass.  OMG it was dreadful.  I mixed up some oil and vinegar to use instead.  But within 10 minutes it was like I had never eaten anything and I was staving all over again.  I ended up eating two little debbie brownies (which Jen had bought--I had sent the majority of my craving foods out of the house with the kid when he went to visit my mom for spring break)... and a small glass of milk.

Today, I just want to curl up and go to bed and hide from the world.  I'm craving like everything... I had an Atkins freezer meal a few minutes ago... which tasted good but will not be something that I will buy in the future because it's just not worth it for the portion you get in my opinion.

Nothing seems to be hitting the spot and the only thing that kept me from going to the vending machine in the break room was the fact that what is normally peanut M&Ms was replaced by the milk chocolate ones.  Not a fave of mine.

I don't want to undo everything I did last week but I'm struggling.  IF my boss is going to be up here for over a month I have to figure out some kind of plan because I can't afford to emotionally eat the whole time and I don't really want to rely on Xanax because while that may mellow me out, it may also make me not give a shit about what I do or don't eat, lol.


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