Sunday, February 21, 2010

foot sex backfires

So the other day I tried out a new and oh so fabulous product.  Goldbond has a pain relieving foot cream that's formulated to work differently than just a normal bengay type product because it's designed to penetrate through tough callused feet...

This product is AWESOME for the record.  It was like bengay on CRACK.... way better.  However, I must remind anyone who uses this product to wash one's hands before rubbing one out or else your clit may catch fire like mine did. 

I text Jen to tell her that my vajayjay was on fire, but oddly invigorated, hahah... she was like, "oh no, poor thing..." She checked on me and "ol girl" the following day... all I'm saying is damn... lesson learned.  Rub clit, then rub feet...

I don't think i could wash my hands enough to make it safe... I'm just glad I tortured myself and that Jen wasn't here for me to get all down and dirty with and set her insides on fire...haha.

Have a great week everyone.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

check, check, and check

My lips are chapped.  Not the rough scratchy peely kind of chapped...but like burning on fire from working in the freezing cold all the time (my freezing cold being 30is--not Mel's snow hell freezing cold)...

I got my tax return and blew most of it...some responsibly, some not so much.

I paid off all my medical bills that I owed on :) Yay... I feel so grown up and shit.

I got a fucking sweet 4 inch memory foam mattress pad that rocks my world.  I laid on it the first time and came... I wish I was kidding.  Now the problem isn't waking up with lower back pain because the mattress sucks, it's waking up achy because I didn't turn over AT ALL... Jen found the same problem.  It's great though because since before I had rigged two twins to make a king... the issue was always the crack in the middle.  For the first time ever (at my house anyway) Jen and I were able to cuddle crack free (well at least mattress crack free, ha)

I got a new computer that actually came today--I'm using it now :) woohoo.. I heart dell.  I discovered their outlet center and bought a scratch and dent model which arrived without a single scratch looking brand new and restored to factory standards and got it 500 gb and all for half the normal price....SWEET.

I got my eyes examined today and ordered two new pairs of glasses (one reg and one pair of sunglasses for my planned fishing expeditions down in Hatteras, NC)...

I am so anti valentine's day... My parents anniversary was VDay... 29 years of marriage... phenomenol (ranks up there with Jude and Mrs. Judes anniversary...shes my hero in case you didn't know)... Dad is still in Kosovo...but mom is leaving early ass tomorrow morning to fly to Greece and meet up with for two weeks and have lots of dirty kinky sex i'm sure.   But I digress... I feel like VDay is such a market nightmare.  I caved though because even though Jen said she wasn't into the whole VDay thing... something about her tone indicated otherwise.  I'm trying to grow in the relationship and am trying a new concept called compromise.  With that being said, I marched straight into her theatre (mind you she can't be openly gay and I've never taken her flowers or anything there...had them delivered a couple of times or so... mainly just use Lil Man as a decoy because whose going to question a moms kid bringing her stuff to work)... I marched up on a Friday fucking night with 973 million people carrying a potted red Tulip and an OBNOXIOUSly large heart balloon and knocked on the ticket window to get her attention (she was helping one of her employees).... when she let me in I was so discombolalated it wasn't even funny...she called me out on how nervous I was... she found it quite funny...I couldn't even get words out I WAS FREAKING... but I made her the center of attention at work and outed her accidentally to her new assistant, lol... but it's all good.

I didn't even mention this to Jen, but I actually put a chunk of change away in savings for my moving out of Gma's house plan.... to help Jen and I in the long run (I'm very proud of this)... like I mean it looks like I'm not going to get tattoo number 13 right now (I won't say ever) but I have to have my priorities right.

I cut all my hair off again and have regressed back to the faux hawk.

Mom gave me a book to read called the Happiness Project by some Gretchin chick... I've only read the preface but it basically talks about the authors discontentment.  Like she wasnt' sad or depressed, she just wasn't "happy"... it goes on to help discover individual happiness... I could use that.

It seesm like all I ever do these days is bitch and whine.  I said I was going to stop doing both at work and it turns out that I just don't have a lot of shit to say, period. sad.

I still havent changed back to my healthy eating habits and I'm starting to feel fat again... like the uncomfortable fatty feel... not cool.  Still haven't joined the gym... it's still on my list.. Right now I'm just trying to wait on my new shoes to arrive ... I broke down and spent a bazillion bucks on a pair of MBTs.... I tried some on and I swear to god it was like walking on air... I felt fifty pounds lighter because there wasn't all that weight on my feet and joints... this is going to help... if I can get my feet to not hurt...then I can explore my exercise goals further.

check, check, check

Monday, February 8, 2010

Double Ds

I ran some errands with mom yesterday... she needed to return some bras that she wasn't very fond of and while we were there I was looking to see what they had.  For the record this was JCPenney (not Victoria Secret since the only thing they sell in my size is lotion)... but I digress

I normally buy my bras at Lane Bryant... I typically wear a 42 B (impressive right HA)... well I felt like I wasn't buying the right size...so I asked the lady to fit me for a bra... I'm almost 29 and have never actually been "fitted"... I wear what fits and what's comfortable...

The lady wrapped the tape around me and told me that I was a 44 Double Fucking D.... What, are you serious??? Where the fuck are those boobs...cuz they aren't on my chest for sure and I'm sure Jen will vouch for me in this area.  I'm comfortable with what I have... they don't hurt my back, or take up a lot of space...but anyway...I just couldn't believe that shit... a 44 DD...

That lady must have needed a break, her blood sugar was obviously low.... If I fucking had DDs I'd probably never leave the house... I'm a boobie girl... thats why Jen and I get along so well... muaauauauahahahaha

a horrific day

So I had a shitty day today and it wasn't just because it was Monday.  Long story short I now work for a company whose warehouse division has been deemed inadequate (the division that I'm now a supervisor in) "we" are fucking things up left and right in the eyes of many.  I've worked for places where shit happened and a solution had to be found QUICK.  Well what I'm finding is that due to some people being inadequate in their position, a chain reaction has been caused.  I'm not laying blame on one person specifically by any means.  I even own the fact that when I pull orders I have been known to not send the correct amount (as in, if I need 512 bags of product and that equals 13 cases and I have say 15 cases on a pallet, hell yeah... I'll send the whole pallet)

I've learned my lesson though because this did nothing but create more work for me and my team in the long run.  Back to the shitty day though-- Today was a shipping day.  We were supposed to ship the 2nd wave of a particular customers order out... this is a BIG account.  Well the only thing that went out was Water plants... (only about 1/4 of the total shipment) You see that what had happened was.... some of the plants/packages produced in house were put in the wrong bags.  To fix this a label was made to put over the "wrong" directions that were preprinted on said bag... well the big wigs including the VP of sales who in a normal situation should never really step foot in the warehouse is going to be coming out into the warehouse tomorrow and doing a check of every single rack that was supposed to go out today to ensure that the appropriate label is on EVERY SINGLE box.

Big deal right? Um... if anything is fucked up on this shipment this customer is pulling their business... so yeah BIG FUCKING DEAL....SERIOUS SHIT....This means that worse case scenario EVERYONE could be fired and they could choose to start from scratch.

I'm kind of pissed though because I'm being reemed for shit that really isn't my fault (and so is the other new guy in shipping) but because I'm part of the team....EVERYONE IS AT FAULT.  Blah...

I dunno...I know that tomorrow is going to be hell...this whole week really...we are now behind in shipping which is pushing us behind for the rest of the week.  I just wish shit was more organized and I worked with more accountable people...or that they'd get rid of the folks that are fucking shit up before we all get escorted out of the building.

Ugh.  Breathing....breathing....

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Productivity increases...

I still havent joined the gym. I'm down a total of 26 pounds now since starting (and then slightly giving up on my weight loss goals)... like November I think...

I finally sat down this evening and applied to consolidate all of my student loans (an estimated 49,000 will cost me about $96000 over the next 25 years if approved)...ridiculous.

I initiated the talk today with Jen.  The one where I mentioned to her and tried to get a feel for her thoughts on us moving in together.  It's not going to happen tomorrow or anything... this summer is the plan.  Details still need to be worked out.  We both want to be closer to our jobs, I'm freaking because I don't know how much I can actually afford in rent with all my other bills, but I feel like its time to grow up and make it work... I can't live with grandma much longer.  The summer will be the perfect time...lil man will be out of school and visiting his grandparents or dad... all the moving can take place, she can move him to a new school district if necessary and we can get everything set up.  I'd love to find an inexpensive lil house to rent with a fenced in back yard for Pepper...but I don't know if that's feasible or not.  Time will tell.  The important thing is that for the first time in my life... I feel certain of my decision in bringing this up.  I dunno it's hard to explain my feelings right now... plus I'm rushing because I need to get all these random thoughts out of my head and get to bed... I have to work in the am...

My eyes are burning.  I didn't sleep well last night. I keep having these random nightmares and pepper was being a damn bed hog.  Go figure.  I didn't watch the Superbowl... I havent watched a single football game this season, why would I start now..I don't even care about the commercials... guess that makes me a bad american or something

The director of operations at work thinks hes getting fired and has basically said that the rate we are going we will all be replaced.  The warehouse department is seeming to be inadequate and more time is being spent fixing shit than just doing it right the first time... this is scary... but I'm just hoping that shit will fix itself or that we can correct shit before it hits the fan... I dunno what else to say about any of it...

I did my taxes the other day. I owe Virginia $3... can you believe that shit.  I went ahead and paid them only because the one year I neglected to file with VA they sent me a bill stating I owed like 700 bucks according to their estimates...I filed and they ended up owing me 35... wankers.

I've been living in snow/rain hell...the snow part is uncommon for Coastal VA... to say the least.  Last weekend we ended up getting about 7 inches and life stopped for most of the area... hell lil man didn't go back to school until Thursday (the snow fell on Friday/Saturday...) crazy... I hate snow. We had flurries again this weekend but nothing crucial or life threatening...this time it was northern VA and DC that got it... record snowfall from what I understand. 

I have so much stuff to get out tonight and not enough time to do it... judging my the smell leaking from Pepper's ass...it's time to take her out and call it a night...

Perhaps I'll have time to get caught up... I'm not counting on it though... blah blah blah