The move

I'm at the point where I'm freaking out.  There is still a lot to do and this control freak is having a hard time dealing with things that are out of my control.  There's a whole lot of what if this happens or what if this occurs, etc etc etc... Don't get me wrong, I'm super excited and soooo ready to move in with Jen.  I think it's a great thing for us... I'm just hoping I don't die before all of this goes down.

I have a giant pile of crap for a yard sale once the weather cools down, but even more crap to combine with Jen's and try to fit in an apartment.  I'm stressed out with work, despite calling out yesterday and only being here today for 49 minutes so far... I just hate this place.  I should be happy that I have a job, but something that seemed so perfect in the beginning is proving to be anything but at this point.  My boss is an arrogant asshole who thinks he knows everything and is currently pouting because he's convinced that I stole his idea for a suggestion I made, which I didn't... He doesn't have his facts straight that's for sure... one of my suggestions was something I also suggested at a previous employer and the other one I didn't claim as my own, I simply said, "I understand that ya'll used to do things this way... I think we should go back to that because the cost savings would be great..." I didn't make anything my own idea... I simply took a thought that I had been telling my boss, but who blocks me out because he gets tired of the sound of my voice thereby making nothing happen in the long run and presented the thought to the CEO who just so happened to agree with me.

I really just want to win the lottery.  Like tonight.  Win it, quit my job, find an awesome, reasonable house in a great school district for lil man, and pay someone to move my shit for me.  Then try and get Jen to quit her job as well and we could start something together on our own time... no more of her working every weekend, or every date night, or ALL the time... type of stuff. 

It's sad... It's like I tell myself as I lay in bed the night before that tomorrow's gonna be a good day and I'm going to go into work with a smile on my face and get the stuff done that I need to and not let these fuckers get to me, but they always do.  I'm bitter.

I hate that I'm the only female supervisor, I hate that anytime I have a thought they think it's me bitching, I hate that I work with homophobes, I hate that my ethics are tested and failed during busy seasons, I hate the heat...

On a lighter note I love Jen.  I love that I won't have to wake up in the middle of the night and have pepper laying next to me but not Jen... I love that we get to start a new chapter of our lives and I love how I've never loved someone so intensely in my life even if that is extremely scary for me a lot of the time.  For now... I just need to make it to 3 o'clock... The move happens on Thursday the 1st... everyone keep your fingers crossed, please.